The Power of Positive Expectation

It has been said, “You cannot rise above your current level of expectation.” What you expect, or believe is going to happen, usually does. We tend to get out of ourselves and others exactly what we expect to get.

I read sometime ago about a salesman that for several years had earned $25,000.00 per year. It didn’t matter what he did, he always earned the same amount. His company decided to give him a new territory, where the salesman before him made $100,000.00 per year. Believe it or not even though he should have and could made considerably more, he only made $25,000.00. Why? Because that is all he expected to make.

Listen to people around you, and you will hear them say things such as, “I expected that to happen.” “Nothing good ever happens for me.” I even heard one man say, “If it weren’t for bad luck, I wouldn’t have any luck at all.” And, you know what? They were all right. They all got exactly what they expected.

To be the person you were created to be, and to achieve what you have the potential to achieve, you must begin to develop the power of positive expectation. Determine today to begin believing for good things to happen to you. Get rid of your “stinkin thinkin!” Change your attitude. Begin to expect the best in life.

Expect success. Expect to make a sale. Expect for your efforts to be fruitful. Expect others to be favorable to you. Expect to be everything you were created to be. Expect love. Expect promotion.

If you will begin to raise your level of expectation you will be surprised at what begins to happen for you. Jesus once said, “As your faith is, so be it unto you.” Nothing could be truer. You get what you expect.

An Attitude of Gratitude

Today is Thanksgiving Day. A time we will gather with friends and love ones and enjoy a great meal and each others company. Thanksgiving Day in the United States, is a day we have set aside to show our gratitude for all our blessings in life. Thanksgiving is a time to reflect on the good things that we have been privileged to enjoy.

Unfortunately, many people don’t feel they have anything to be faithful for. When you ask then what they are thankful for they have trouble putting it in words. Sadly, all they can see is the negative circumstances they find themselves in and the things they wish they had but don’t. By focusing on your circumstances and what you don’t have you lose perspective of what you do have.

I know on this day, many that read this, make a list of things they are thankful for. If you don’t you should. Something energizing takes place when you take the time to list all the blessings in your life to be thankful for.

As I am writing this blog, I was reminded of a song we used to sing at church when I was a young child. While I may not remember all the words, I remember the gist of it. It simply said, “Count your blessings, Name them one by one, Count your blessings, See what God has done.” That’s a good idea not just one day a year but something we should practice on a daily basis!

Here’s a shortened version of my list:

• I am thankful to be alive and well.

• I am thankful to have the use of my surgically repaired arm.

• I am thankful for my wonderful wife and best friend, Holly.

• I am thankful for our wonderful children.

• I am thankful for all my friends that have stood by me and believed in me.

• I am thankful to live in America, the land of the free and the home of the brave.

• I am thankful for the dreams, desires, and abilities God has endowed me with.

• Last but not least, I am thankful for God’s love, grace, and faithfulness to me.

Perhaps you are going through a tough time, but remember while your circumstances may not be what you like someone is going through something worse. Make the decision today to make everyday a day of Thanksgiving. Being thankful is a choice you make. A common denominator of highly successful people is their attitude of gratitude. An attitude of gratitude is like a muscle, to develop it you have to work it, or you will lose it.

I received an email from Dr. Keith Johnson, the confidence coach, (http://www.theconfidencecoach.com) that gave the following list of seven questions to ask yourself daily to build your attitude of gratitude and confidence which I thought I should share with you in today’s blog post.

1. What am I most happy about in my life now?
2. What am I most excited about in my life now?
3. What am I most proud about in my life now?
4. What am I most grateful about in my life now?
5. What am I enjoying most in my life right now?
6. What am I committed to in my life right now?
7. Who do I love? Who loves me?

Happy Thanksgiving!

What you need in a friend

Henry Ford once said, “My best friend is the one who brings out the best in me.” Your personal associations are key to your success in life. The fact is you become like the people you associate with. Like begets like.

Negative people will drain you of your purpose, energy, time, confidence, action, and productivity. Negative, complaining, faultfinding people are toxic to your success. Most people would never dream of ingesting something poisonous into their physical body, however they are quick to associate with others that are poisonous to their future. Make the decision today to get rid of the toxic people in your life.

Determine to associate with winners. King Solomon wrote, “Iron sharpens iron.” In other words by associating with positive, productive, successful people you are sharpening your own ability for success.

Make friends with those who challenge you to be better than you presently are. A friend is someone who helps you bridge the gaps between loneliness and fellowship, frustration and confidence, despair and hope, meaninglessness and purpose, setbacks and successes. He is your friend who pushes you to be the best you can be.

What Is Important to Me?

All of us have different priorities in life. Some value a foreign sports car, others a big home, others an important title or position. What are your priorities? When was the last time you even thought about what is really important to you?

Making a list of your personal priorities can be an interesting and rewarding thing to do. It can help you get your life in order, increase personal success and make you feel better about yourself.

A sample list of priorities could be, 1) Serving God, 2) Spending time with your family, 3.) Your career, 4.) Having a hobby, 5.) Reading, 6.) Going back to school, 7.) Exercise, 8.) Eating right and so on. You get the picture!

By compiling a list of your personal priorities you are able to determine what is truly important to you. You are also able to gauge how much time you spend in each area and make adjustments as necessary.

Making a list forces you to be all you can be. It also protects you from the demands and expectations of others.

Take Responsibility

Personal responsibility is a characteristic lacking in many. Ever since the Garden of Eden, when Adam blamed Eve, and Eve blamed the serpent for their disobedience, humans have been playing the blame game. Rather than accept personal responsibility for their lives they would rather pass the buck to others for the place they find themselves.

The fact is the sooner you accept personal responsibility, the sooner you begin to excel in life. All high achievers have learned the value of accepting personal responsibility. They understand “If its to be, its up to me.”

You are the only person that can determine your future. It is your responsibility to be happy, to be proactive rather than reactive, to step out and do something about your situation in life.

I am responsible for the person I am today as well as the person I am becoming.
While there are many things that have an impact on who I am and who I become, ultimately if I am going to be a better person than I am right now, it’s up to me. As Robert Schuller says, “If it’s to be, it’s up to me.” Change will only happen in my life when I make the decision for it to. Regardless of how others try to influence me to be all I can be, it is my responsibility to do so.

I am responsible for my choices and my actions.
Flip Wilson made a fortune with, and popularized the saying, “The devil made me do it!” While that may be a funny line, it is far from the truth. In reality no one can make me do anything I don’t want to do. To blame others for where I am in life is simply to make excuses for my lack of making the right choices and doing the right things. I am where I am in life today as a result of my decisions and actions of yesterday.

I am responsible for my attitude.

Did you know attitudes like measles are evident to everyone around you? How you view life and the perspective you have of life is solely dependant on you and you alone. If you want to you can be an up person in a down world. I’ve heard people say when they have a bad attitude, “I guess I got up on the wrong side of the bed.” With the disposition they display most of us wish they had never gotten up! The good news however is you don’t have to have a bad attitude and be a pain in everyone’s neck. Recognize you are in control of your attitude, no one else. Choose to be more optimistic and pleasing in your relationships with others.

I am responsible for the attitude I bring to my work.

A lot of people bring their home problems with them to work. As a result of their personal frustrations, anger and disillusions of their home life, they are not as effective as they could be. I have found that people that get ahead in life have developed the knack for compartmentalizing their life. They have learned to focus on the task at hand and to give it their all. Determine to leave your home problems where they belong, at home. After all stewing and worrying all day about the problems you are facing will not change them at all. So make the decision to come to work with a good, positive, upbeat attitude.

I am responsible for my relationships.

As stated at the beginning of this chapter, ever since the Garden of Eden mankind has played the blame game. After all, it’s easier to blame others or circumstances for trouble in relationships, then it is to take a good hard look at ourselves and then admit that we aren’t perfect. My mother told me along time ago, “It takes two too tango.” In other words relationships are a two way street. If I am going to develop and maintain good relationships, whether it the family or at work, I am going to have to do my part to make them work. That means I may have to make some changes in how I treat others and how I expect to be treated. Usually if there is a breakdown in a relationship it is because someone failed act responsibly and do there part to make it work.

I am responsible for the quality of my communication.

Communication is the bedrock of success in all areas of life. Perhaps no other culprit is as destructive as a lack of communication. Communication involves more than just talking on your part. It involves listening, empathizing, and understanding what the other party is saying. While we must seek to be understood and to understand during the communication process, we must also be cognizant of how we say things. So what we say, and how we say it, are equally important. Our volume, tone of voice, body language, and facial expressions are all part of the communication process. I must seek to be kind, considerate and understanding of the person or persons I am communicating with.

I am responsible for my happiness.

Since I am in control of my life, I can be happy regardless of what’s going on in my life, if I choose too. As with many things, happiness is an attitude. As a Christian I can be happy because I have the joy of the Lord inside me. Happiness does not come from what I have or don’t have, it comes from knowing who I am, what my purpose in life is, and in doing what I was created to do.

I am responsible for my financial situation.

My financial condition is a direct result of my financial literacy, work habits and personal discipline. While there are times when bad things happen to good people and as a result they face a financial setback, for the most part people struggle financially because they don’t have a good grasp of how money works. They don’t understand the need for financial planning, setting financial goals, learning to invest, paying their bills on time, and saving for the future. If I want to become financially free, where I don’t work for money but instead money works for me, then I must seek to become financially literate.

I am responsible for my mistakes.

Any mistake I have ever made was of my own volition. I either did what I knew better than to do or didn’t know what to do in the first place. Even if I followed the advice of others or allowed them to pressure me to do something I wasn’t comfortable with, ultimately I am responsible for my actions. The sooner you recognize that you are responsible for the mistakes you’ve made in life the sooner you can do something to change the. Now let me say right here, don’t allow yourself to get bogged down in great sorrow for the mistakes you’ve made, and for goodness sakes, don’t hold a perpetual pity party because of them. Learn from them, let them go, forgive yourself and get on with your life.

I am responsible for my personal success.

No matter how much someone else may want to see you succeed in life, no matter how much they encourage and motivate you, no matter how much they try to help you, only you can make the decision to be successful. If I am going to be successful I am going to have to do the right things the right way in a consistent manner. I am going to have to set goals, make plans, work hard and not quit if I want to have success in life. Success belongs to everyone but not everyone will enjoy it because they aren’t willing to do what it takes to have it.

Responsibility

Winston Churchill said, “The price of greatness is responsibility.” In our society many are playing what has been labeled as the “blame game.” Rather than accept personal responsibility for their actions too many make excuses or blame others.

The word responsibility takes within its meaning your ability to respond to the circumstances you are faced with. Those who accept responsibility understand, “If it’s to be, it’s up to me.” God has placed in you the ability you need to do what needs to be done to produce the success you desire.

Have the courage to face your circumstances with confidence that everything is going to work out right. It is fear that causes people to shirk responsibility for their lives. God has not given us the spirit of fear, but love, power and a sound mind.

Determine today to get off the merry go round of blaming others for your shortcomings and failures. Accept personal responsibility for your life. Make the decision to do your part to change the circumstances at hand. Release the abilities inside you and you’ll be amazed at what happens.

You Can’t Please Everyone

It is not possible to please everyone. I have learned that not everyone is happy with me all the time. I used to drive myself crazy trying to please everyone I could.

It is enlightening to realize that some people are drawn to me, while others are repelled by me. The fact of the matter is there are personality conflicts with some people. It is not that others are necessarily bad people, just different. Never try to force relationships that are uncomfortable. They aren’t worth the frustration.

Choose to be the person you were made to be. Do what you need to do and don’t worry about whether everyone is pleased or not.

All great leaders have had to deal with this issue. Those who are highly successful have learned to please God, themselves and those they are required to please. The rest, oh well….